4.12.2016

Other Half of My Puzzle

Relationships thrive on more than love and trust. There needs to be respect and understanding too. How can you expect your man to show you 'love' if you don't respect him? How can you expect her to respect you if you don't show your love for her with more than just your words?

I'm far from an expert, but I've learned a few things in my 25 years of life and 10+ years of different relationships from cute and naive to toxic and even abusive.
I've struggled with balancing my feministic tendencies with necessary sacrifice and knowing when to just shut up and get over it. I've experienced the consequences of holding on to the past, like staying in contact with exes I didn't need to, and trying to make everyone but me happy, and the consequences of giving too much too soon and what happens when you mold your entire world around one person.

Today in particular I am grateful, thankful and humbled by the way Josh Markle loves me. Neither of us expected our journey together to go in the direction it did, but with each curve ball we end up stronger and happier and more solid. It's not always flowers and rose petals and candles and expensive gifts (actually it rarely is, now with offspring lol) but I'm never stressed about loyalty, honesty or security. And not because I'm naive or blind. 

It's waking up to your best friend every morning and going to bed knowing there will be a tomorrow to try again. 
It's sharing bites of the food you ordered because it's really good and you want them to understand how good.
It's playing late night video games in your undies and pj's to decide who's doing the dishes next.
It's laughing histerically at them tripping and falling, then tripping yourself.
It's watching your favorite shows and movies and critiquing every aspect of it to each other and agreeing (for the most part)
It's texting them stupid memes and ugly faces on snapchat just to make them roll their eyes.
It's arguing over the socks on the floor and how they do the laundry wrong but then cooking them their favorite dinner or snack later without batting an eye.
It's watching them tickle and hug your kid every night before bed and seeing them in your kid's eyes when they get mad or laugh.

Every relationship is different because people are different and situations and lifestyles are different.
But when you find a relationship that doesn't stress you out, it's because you have trust, loyalty, respect AND love.
For yourself, and for them.

So it's okay to not respond to every guy/girl that sends you a message, whether you know them or not. It's also okay to do things without your dude or woman every once in a while.
It's okay to let them win every so often. And it's okay to let them know when something is not okay. 

It's not 50/50. It's 100/100. 
It's not about being someone's dream girl or finding that ultimate happiness in someone.
It's about growing along side someone and both fighting battles and overcoming mistakes together.
It's about your goals together. Your every day struggles and victories.

It's about balance.

This isn't a brag post. It's just a revelation and honest observation from what I hope is learned wisdom from experience.

I still have no idea what I'm doing, but I know I'm getting there and I have the best partner in crime anyone could ask for.
And so does he ;)

♡♡♡

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